Friday, March 16, 2007

HOW MANY DOGS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB?

1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb?

2. Border Collie: Only one? I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code afterwards.

3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid lamp!

4. Rottweiler: Make me!

5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

6. Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I've led these people from the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of the situation.

8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the walls and furniture.

9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light bulb?

10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the dark.

11. Chihuahua : Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or "We don't need no stinking light bulb"

12. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

13. Australian Cattle Dog : First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a little circle...

14. Bichon: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

The Cat's Answer:

Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light bulbs. So, the real question is:

How long will it be before I can expect some light, some dinner, and a massage?"

ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE STAFF!

 

 

11 comments:

Ice said...

How many queers does it take to change a light bulb?

3... One to hold the ladder, one to change it, and one to say "FAAAABBBBULOUS"

(guess I'm a racist again, even though I dont make the jokes up, or snap the pics and put the captions on them, lol)

GOOD WEEKEND :)

SIMON said...

Not to mention sexist and probably every other ist you can think of!
Don't you ever change!

Ice said...

haha... : P

Oh, and I won't change :) I AM ME, love me or leave me!

I always go with my 'badself' :D

jillie said...

My dogs are just dumb asses...lol!

Hey...recognize the avatar? Never trust a nurse that drinks Jack Daniels....LMAO

SIMON said...

Hey Ice love the BADself

Jillie Hi, now there's a funny thing, the avatar was stolen from let me think, oh yeah...me and I stole it from, hang on a second, oh yes it's coming to me now............Ice!
Great to see you!

Ice said...

I recognize the avatar, I had it up at my site a week ago... lol.

Jules said...

I sure got a giggle from this post.. Okay, I'm staying around here for a long while. You got it goin' on, Eb!

SIMON said...

Thank you Jules for brightening up my site and blogland in general!

Mona said...

& do you know? .... while dogs have happiness in their tails[ which keeps following them] cats have anger in theirs [ which keeps following them too]...

SIMON said...

No I didn't know that Mona - your comments are so full of wisdom.
Thank you for that.

SIMON said...
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