A DUCK TALE!!

THIS IS A STORY OF DUCKS! IT'S NOT EVEN A STORY! AND ONLY LOOSELY ABOUT DUCKS!



DUCK - THE WORD



1. Any of various wild or domesticated swimming birds of the family Anatidae, characteristically having a broad, flat bill, short legs, and webbed feet.
2. A female duck.
3. The flesh of a duck used as food.
4. Slang A person, especially one thought of as peculiar.
5. Chiefly British A dear. Often used in the plural with a singular verb. More.........

THE URBAN DUCK.

DUCK - THE BIRD

DONALD DUCK

DUKWS

LADIES AND GENTLEMAN THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GIVE SOMEONE LIKE ME TWO INSPIRATIONAL BLOGGER AWARDS!

Wow it's hard work being a superstar!!

Lazy post......loads to do, party mess to clean up!

Thanks again to everyone, need some inspirational music? Well I do!!

IRON MAIDEN - NUMBER OF THE BEAST!!!

ENJOY!! SEE YOU ALL TOMORROW!

HEY CHECK THIS OUT!!

NO I MEAN IT
CHECK THIS OUT!!

FIRST OF ALL, I'M JUST AN ORDINARY GUY GOING ROUND THE CRAZY WORLD OF BLOGGING, I RUN TWO OTHER SITES APART FROM THIS AND BLOGGING TAKES UP FAR TOO MUCH OF MY TIME!

I'VE MET SOME LOVELY PEOPLE HERE, REAL FRIENDS WHO CARE FOR ME, LOOK AFTER ME, SCOLD ME, LOVE ME, HATE ME JUST LIKE REAL LIFE I NEVER THOUGH THOUGHT FOR A MOMENT THAT IN DOING WHAT I WAS DOING WAS ACTUALLY INSPIRING ANYBODY! NO REALLY!

I DON'T WRITE UNLESS I CAN HELP IT, I FOR THE MOST PART HERE JUST REGURGITATE CRAP FROM OTHER PARTS OF THE WEIRD WIDE WEBBY THING AND ADD SOME OCCASIONALLY WITTY NORTHERN ENGLISH COMMENT PRESS PUBLISH AND THEN THE FUN STARTS. I USED TO THINK THAT IF YOU DIDN'T GET A LOT OF COMMENTS THEN IT WAS A USELESS POST! I USED TO BELIEVE THERE WERE NO LURKERS!

ONCE PEOPLE WERE IN MY COMMENTS BOX THOUGH I TREAT THEM AS VALUED 'CUSTOMERS' TREAT WITH KINDNESS AND RESPECT THEY DIDN'T HAVE TO LEAVE A COMMENT THERE ARE 75 MILLION BLOGSITES IN THE WORLD AND THEY'D CHOSEN MINE TO TAKE THE TIME TO SAY SOMETHING, ANYTHING.

THE PHOTOBLOG IS A NEW SITE THAT FEATURES ONLY MY OWN PHOTOGRAPHY. I JUST SEE THINGS AND TAKE THEM. I LIKE IT, IT'S NICE AND SIMPLE. SEE AN IMAGE PHOTOGRAPH IT PUT IT ON THE COMP IF IT STILL LOOKS GOOD PUBLISH IT.



Are you bored with this yet.....Today I am absolutely delighted to say that I have been awarded not just one Inspirational Blogger Award but two Inspirational Blogger Awards. Let me just claim 'braggers rights' on this. ....not just one Inspirational Blogger Award but two Inspirational Blogger Awards!!!

One for this site and one for the Photoblog!



Number One from Pauline for Wilko News -

"ebezp because he makes me laugh and that helped me to put things in perspective and inspired me to stay."

Number Two from Tina for The Photo Blog -

"Ebezp - for his photo blog which I visit on a daily basis. He is very talented and his photos, especially the nature ones are truly inspiring."

Thank you both, you don't know how happy this has made me. You Girls Rock!I guess now that is over we can all have some champagne can't we!!

As part of being honoured with this award I get to choose 5 people (for each award? - Joke!!) who I believe deserve the award. That's not that easy either - first I have to say that because Pauline's award was first - one of the people that I was going to award the award to was Tina and another person that would normally have received the award from me would be Cathy. Now seeings as both the awards I received have also been given to Cathy, knowing what she's like I doubt she'd see it as a complement to receive three in one day!!

THE FIVE THAT ARE TO RECEIVE THIS AWARD BECAUSE I THINK THEY ARE INSPIRATIONAL AND THEY HAVE BEEN INSPIRATIONAL TO ME ARE : In no particular order,

~d I really don't know where to start, I've learnt so much from her about blogs, the internet, love, life, New Orleans, courage, conviction and not forgetting deleting! ~d has deleted posts that every one of us would be proud of! Including one that said I had a ****ed up image of her! Thanks ~d even that was inspirational as well you know!

Tracey Tracey is single handedly responsible for the transformation of this site in to the three site 'empire' it is now. She was the first of our little band that had a second 'erotic' site and actively encouraged, cajoled and scolded me to start the photoblog. Your encouragement is phenomenal

Autumn Storm A far newer blog friend and inspires from within her comments box and her writing is sensational. She handles a lot of the admin for Team Bravo (take a look at the side bar when you have the time) keeps us all under control and will always deny she's at all inspirational and hopefully this award will remind her just how inspirational she really is!

Jules Jules is a completely different type of inspiration to me. Jules is the one person that when all the world seems to be going off it's head(!) will have a two line post about something totally irelevant, that makes you laugh and make comment and inspires certainly me to carry on! She forgets things so hopefully the award will remind her where to be and when!

Keshi Her writing is absolutely awesome, touching, funny. Her comments back even more so, she's in love with the world and life and wants everyone to be the same and you don't get more inspirational than that!!

Stick around for a while have a chat, have a look around my site and help yourself to champagne, cheese or wine. Make tipsy even more tipsy check out Team Bravo and don't forget go over to the photoblog where at the moment there is some modern art in Paris.

Oh and don't forget the Gutter Press the only site that hasn't got an award!!

CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW

WELCOME.... TO THE CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW POST FEATURING CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW FROM PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN
THIS POST IS ABOUT ARTISTS, ART AND INSPIRATION!
YEAH IT IS! HONEST! IT IS NOT ABOUT INDIVIDUAL ACTORS, IT IS NOT ABOUT MOVIES, IT IS NOT ABOUT FACE CHARACTERS AT THEME PARKS IT'S ABOUT.........
CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW!
THE PORTRAYAL OF A FICTIONAL CHARACTER IN DIFFERENT MEDIUMS

CAPTAIN JACK HAS OF COURSE HIMSELF INSPIRED ARTISTS OF ALL KINDS AND THIS IMAGE BELOW IS ONE OF THE VERY BEST .........EVER.
THE ARTIST IS A GREAT FRIEND OF A GREAT FRIEND AND READER.
IF YOU LIKE IT TELL HIM HE WILL BE OVER THE MOON.
FOLLOW THE LINK OR GO TO deviantart.com AND BROWSE JULIEN1989.

SO NOW YOU KNOW EVERYTHING THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT CAPTAIN JACK!

A SORT OF MUSICAL MONDAY!!

IF YOU EVER GET THE CHANCE IN VEGAS OR ANYWHERE WHERE THEY ARE ON TOUR YOU MUST GO AND SEE THE BLUE MAN GROUP!
NEVER HEARD OF THEM - CLICK HERE .
WANT TO SEE THEM PERFORM YOU KNOW THE YOU TUBE DRILL BY NOW!
LIKE WHAT YOU SEE TELL ME, DON'T LIKE WHAT YOU SEE TELL ME!

SO IT IS TED v MADONNA

SUNDAY POPULARITY POLL

TED v MADONNA



SEE BELOW FOR DETAILS
VOTE NOW!!

TED WINS!! 11 TO 6!!

Thanks to everyone who participated in the fun!

TAGGED AGAIN....WHY ME MEME?

I was tagged by Pauline to answer five questions. Gee thanks Pauline, love you too!

Yeah go over and tell her how unfair it is!!

1.If you could remove one evil from the world what would it be ?

The evil that is responsible for people, men and women alike who abuse children. All the talk seems to be catered on things like punishment and conditioning, just get rid of whatever evil that makes them do it. It can’t be done and it won’t be done but if I could remove that evil I wouldn’t stop until I succeeded!
Meanwhile look here for ways of combating it, ok?

2. What is your most enduring memory of your teenage years ?

If by enduring you mean is still very well remembered and even now and especially since July 1st related with gay abandon then it’s a school memory! Even though I left school at 16 so it only covers 3 years. Oh let me explain properly…..
I’ve smoked cigarettes since I was about 12 with the exception of about 18 months and that was about 25 years ago. I was always getting in to trouble for smoking especially at school.
The three rules were : #1. You mustn’t leave the school premises without permission, #2 Under no circumstances (it being a catholic boys school) were you to be seen around the corner at the girl’s school, #3 Strictly No Smoking in school uniform.
Well three days out of EVERY five guess who got caught breaking all three? Oh it wasn’t just me but it was one hell of a reputation to keep up!! Was never beaten either so I was told at the one and only school reunion I ever went to!!
So it’s a physics lesson in the science lab and Mr Bernie McConnell is in the chair!! “Today we are going to look at air and other crappy gasses, I never really listened and see what happens when blah de blah…….(sleepy)…….Well it was the afternoon – after I’d broken all 3 rules! “Wilkinson, let me have a cigarette” “Sir?” “Let me have a cigarette” “Don’t smoke sir” “Just give me a cigarette..please” Now my Dad was away at sea and where everyone else had Park Drive or Number 6 I always had Rothman’s, State Express or Dunhill and always king size and always Singapore duty paid written down the side of each cigarette. So I take my fag packet to the front of the class, open it up and take a cigarette out to give to him. Leave the packet I might need another one.
He lit the cigarette and took great delight in taking long drags filling his boots as well as his lungs in front of the class. Did the lousy experiment and all the swots with their noses turned up yes even then wondered at how marvellous it was. What did he do he sat and finished the cigarette saying things like Oh how nice it is to be able to smoke while I’m teaching. End of the lesson picks up the packet which must have had 14 or 15 in and said, “Pick your cigarettes up after school from the staff room”
Anyway to cut a long story short……..WTF?………I went to the staff room after school , knocked the door and asked for Mr McConnell – Oh he’s gone! Why did you want to see him. I want my cigarettes back. Oh they’re yours, he left them (Thank F for that) and the teacher handed me the pack with just 2 left in it. Meanwhile there was achorus of Oh Ta Wilkinson! Thanks for the fag! Wish I could afford Rothman’s! Can your Dad get me some!!!
Well even now I still relate that story especially to anti smokers and really for no other reason than to state that once even teachers smoke!!

3. If you were to leave everything to one good cause what would it be ?

Easy and quick this one. It wouldn’t be to the organisation that I dedicate over 40 hours a month to as a volunteer. Because by the time I’m in a position to leave everything to a good cause they will have had enough from me!
No question about it the RNLI.

4. What was your greatest treasure as a child ?

This may not be strictly true but was certainly the easiest! Ted! Original name hey? He looks older than me but I’m told he was ‘born’ when I was about three! The red feet are patches, the part fur and part leopard skin coat is to cover a multitude of sins, the red ribbon round his neck is because basically his head came off!

The silver medal incidentally is a medal given to everyone who went through the new Mersey Tunnel in 1934 which me mum did and it’s hers. Ted just wears it like we would a birthday badge.
Oh and easy because he’s up in the bedroom as the great patriarch of all the other soft toys that have been acquired over the years!!

5. If you could choose anyone at all, who would you invite to dinner ?

You might have already guessed if you didn’t in fact already know that I am a bit of an egotistical, smoking pervert!
Well this question was going to be the one that redeemed myself. Some wise old well dead philosopher or politician or architect or artist or ………..
MADONNA!
My only worry given how much I fancy I mean admire her is having anything to eat or just eating very little very quickly to get to the dessert!
However the question was to do with inviting, not doing!

I am now supposed to come up with five questions and five people to answer them and although I know I’m risking eternal damnation I’m not doing either!
However if you want to answer this one question either in my comments box here or make some more up and do them on your own site just go for it!

My one question is this,
IF YOU COULD WAKE UP TOMORROW HAVING GAINED ANY ONE ABILITY OR QUALITY, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

thank you for visiting, feel free to browse around, visit my other sites.

this site welcomes comments. thank you!

RANDOM WEDNESDAY

ISN'T THE INTERNET WONDERFUL? SOME RANDOM PICS

A year from today the olympic games start in China, so there are loads of images everywhere, this is just one...
Also in China, let's try water biking?
or in Frankfurt but obviously not from there originally is this bowl balancer
218 nudes in Prague

Two cute pics from zoos across the globe



Ok I'm off down the beach to build myself a woman!!

RIGHT DID YOU SEE YESTERDAYS POST, NO REALLY THIS IS IMPORTANT, IT'S TO DO WITH PUTTING YOUR COMUTER TO GOOD USE AND SEEING ME MODEL A T SHIRT!SEE I TOLD YOU IT WAS IMPORTANT!

FOR YESTERDAY'S POST JUST CLICK ANYWHERE ROUND HERE!

MEANWHILE DON'T FORGET CLICK THE BOX FOR

FOREIGNER - COLD AS ICE,

MAKE TIPSY SWIM,

THE GUTTER PRESS AND THE PHOTOBLOG!

just enjoy yourself oh and thank you for visiting!

CLICK HERE!

Ok lurking on my side bar for a month or more has been the following under the heading I'm in TEAM BRAVO : World Community Grid and Team Bravo and a couple of other related links.
Have you ever clicked on them? Be honest now! No of course you haven't, hell I don't even think I would!
Maybe you'd click on them if they were bigger....

WORLD COMMUNITY GRID

TEAM BRAVO

So what do you think? Honestly! Wonderful cause, no trouble on your computer, easy and quick to set up, fight diseases from your computer and you don't have to do anything. Join a friendly team and forget about it, everything is done for you! Five minutes of your time and your done. So by now you should have the World Community Grid homepage open and be starting to download this totally harmless software, but wait a minute........you want the small print don't you I know you do........so when you've read the small print you'll do it ok? That's a deal then?

Good here's the small print.

There is a competition going on to recruit more members obviously for the WCG but more importantly for Team Bravo and the person that recruits the most new members to Team Bravo stands to win a beautifully designed T shirt!

Now I want that T shirt badly, you have no idea how much I want it!

So here's the small print deal.....

......if by you joining up right now I win the T shirt I will model it just for you on all my sites including the Gutter Press, which means I will only be wearing a T shirt!

Not only that I will model it for you in your very own comments box if you really want me to and it will be a joy to behold - it is a lovely T shirt!

Of course that may not do anything for you and after all why should it so I'm prepared to send each and every one of you that join because of this post a set of my photographs from the photo blog now I can't say fairer than that can I?

That's it that's the truth, the small print, the bribery and corruption out of the way so all you have to do is join!

Thank you! It will be worth it!

For me though if you do join because of this request to you please leave a comment to that affect in my comments box.

SCROLL UP AND START CLICKING, WHAT'S KEEPING YOU?

OH THANK YOU AGAIN!!

By the way if you join with a different name to what we know you as here, please could you let me know which name!

This post will stay only until Wednesday about 5pm here but of course even after that you can always sign up through my side bar. Team Bravo's competition ends next weekend but the good work of the World Community Grid never ends.

Meanwhile don't forget The Photoblog and The Gutter Press.

WELL YESTERDAY APPARENTLY WAS THE HOTTEST DAY OF THE YEAR IN THE UK SO FOR THE FIRST POST FOR TODAY A FEW TOURISTY PICTURES OF LIVERPOOL IN THE SUN!

I DOUBT SHE WAS AMUSED!

A DUCK? OH YES OF COURSE I DIDN'T RECOGNISE IT OUT OF THE WATER!

NOW YOU MAY REMEMBER STEVIE NICKS BROKE MY VIDEO YESTERDAY! HOWEVER BECAUSE SHE IS SO GOD DAMN DROP DEAD GORGEOUS I'M GIVING HER ANOTHER CHANCE AND AS SHE IS SINGING SARA LIVE I WILL LET HER OFF BUT FOR THE MO IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER OR EVEN HEAR HER YOU HAVE TO CLICK HER!!

IT'S MARITIME MONDAY ON THE PHOTOBLOG, GO SEA!!

STILL A STORY ON THE GUTTER PRESS UNTIL LATER THEN IT'S BACK TO THE PICS!

WHILE YOU'RE HEAR PLEASE PLEASE LOOK AT THE TEAM BRAVO BIT ON THE SIDEBAR OVER THERE ON THE RIGHT BECAUSE I AM GOING TO BE ASKING QUESTIONS LATER. NO REALLY!!

IF YOU GET THIS FAR YOU DESERVE TO KNOW THAT I HAVE LIED TO YOU, KIDDED YOU THAT ALL THOSE PICS WERE TAKEN YESTERDAY!

THEY WEREN'T, NOT ONE OF THEM, THEY WERE TAKEN FRIDAY!!

OPEN ALL WEEKEND

It's Churches on Sunday on The Photoblog and there's a NSFW Hen night story on The Gutter Press

Video chosen by jlee is Garbage and after 6pm Stevie Nicks (Wow I've only just realised that she is 60 next birthday, I've got to change my dream now!!)chosen by Palm Springs Savant
Listen I know you are bored because you're reading this on a Sunday so check out the links!!

Stevie seems to have broken my video link.
I'll attempt to repair it tomorrow!!

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"IT IS NOT HOW OLD YOU ARE BUT HOW YOU ARE
OLD"

- JULES RENARD

FOUR LETTER WORD

There is a dangerous virus being passed electronically, orally and by hand. This virus is called WORK.
If you receive WORK from any of your colleagues, your boss or anyone else via any means DO NOT TOUCH IT.
This virus will wipe out your private life completely. If you should come into contact with WORK put your jacket on and take 2 good friends to the nearest pub. Purchase the antidote known as WINE. The quickest acting is called CHARDONNAY but this is only available for those who can afford it, the NHS equivalent is BLUE NUN. Take the antidote repeatedly until WORK has been completely eliminated from your system.

TGIF JOKES

Cops Say the Darndest Things!

#16 "You know, stop lights don't come any redder that the one you just went through."

#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."

#14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you."

#11 "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

#10 "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I'm warning you not to do that again or I'll give you another ticket."

#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop."

#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

#4 "How big were those 'Just two beers' you say you had?"

#3 "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."

#2 "I'm glad to hear that Chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."

#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here!

Something's Going Around the Convent

Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, 'I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhoea in the convent.'

'Thank God,' said an elderly nun at the back. 'I'm so tired of chardonay.'

Excuses for the General

The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily.

"Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."

The General was very sceptical about this explanation but at least he was here so he let the G.I. go. Moments later, eight more G.I.s came up to the general panting, he asked them why they were late.

"Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."

The General eyed them, feeling very sceptical but since he let the first guy go, he let them go, too. A ninth G.I. jogged up to the General, panting heavily.

"Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but..."

"Let me guess," the General interrupted, "it broke down."

"No," said the G.I., "there were so many dead horses in the road, it took forever to get around them."

Too Many Instructions

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen. 'Careful,' he said, 'CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the! salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!'
The wife stared at him. 'What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?'
The husband calmly replied, 'I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving.

PLEASE NOTE TAKE FIVE FRIDAY HAS MOVED TO THE PHOTOBLOG

Video - How you remind me - Nickleback!

PADDY FIELD ART FROM JAPAN

The Great Wave of Kanagawa is a major feature in this year's rice field exhibition in Japan

More than 8,000 villagers help create the works. In 2006, the gods of Fujin and Raijin.

Reproductions of 18th century works have also been created.

The tradition in the town of Inakadate, dates back to 1993.

But other have now joined in. This was the work created in Yonezawa this year.

And they created paddy field artwork in Yonezawa in 2006.

While in Nishio, in the Aichi prefecture, people have been creating an insect theme.

A dragonfly was created in 2005 and a beetle in 2006.

Seaweed on the Photoblog

Video : Evanescence - Going Under oh and nearly forgot Nylons on The Gutter

OF DOGS AND THE SEA!

SUNS OUT AGAIN AND THE TIDES IN AND DOGS JUST HAVE TO DO WHAT DOGS JUST HAVE TO DO.

MORE OF THE TIDE IN ON THE PHOTOBLOG

PLUS BACK TO THE WOMEN ON THE GUTTER PRESS

VIDEO - LA ISLA BONITA - MADONNA